Day 45 Leadership and Expectations Part 1 The Heavy Cloak of Expectations

One of the heaviest cloaks we will ever be asked to wear is the cloak of other people’s expectations of us. Many long to sit at the top table and want to move from the unnoticed to the noticed. Yet it is those who are unnoticed who have the greatest freedom to simply be, because nothing is really expected of them. Those at the top table may at first enjoy being in the spotlight with others looking to them, but that joy quickly disappears once they realise that in that position, others will feel free to judge and criticise them for not meeting their expectations of those given these lofty positions.

It is hard to be a leader. Followers need leaders but deep down they wish that they didn’t. They know that leadership is not really for them but they are not short of thoughts and opinions about who and what leaders should be. They ‘should be’ this and that and the other. Yet what they fail to realise is that no one can ever live up to every expectation that others have of them. Deep down people want a saviour, one who will always do right all of the time and never fail them or let them down. But that’s an impossibility for anyone, even God himself, to live up to. The moment something in one’s life goes wrong, we blame God for not protecting us or letting bad things happen to good people. So, if we are so hard on an omnipresent and omnipotent God, how much harsher will we be on our fellow man? At the heart of much of the criticism will lie jealousy. Whilst most do not want the responsibility and headache of leadership, they don’t really want others to succeed either. They don’t want others to stand out, be noticed and cheered on. If they can’t know this experience, why should others? And so they pile so many expectations upon this poor soul in leadership, so that even if they worked 24 hours a day, seven days a week, year after year, it still wouldn’t be enough. Leaders are doomed to fail because they are not saviour figures, just human beings with the courage to dare to lead. Rarely will leaders be thanked. Rarely will leaders be appreciated. They are just expected to do their job and do it well. Many leaders don’t get paid. Many leaders will never see any rewards that they would feel would compensate them for all their losses and the things that they have had to give up. Yet leaders continue to want to lead because they have a strong vision and calling inside them to change the world in some way for the better.

That is why we follow the leaders. We like that they have a vision of a better world and that too is what we hope and desire for deep down, to be part of a movement or a wave bringing new life to the world which will forever bless it and change it. We might criticise our leaders, but often it is only because our desire for a changed world is as great as theirs but we don’t feel able to achieve that on our own. Instead, we invest all our hopes in them, our leaders, to lead us to the promised land. When we get disappointed with them, it is really because we are in some way disappointed with life not delivering the world we crave. So next time you criticise a leader, recognise that your unrealistic expectations of them might prove to be a heavy cloak that they might not be able to bear wearing. They are trying their best. Support them. Encourage them. Don’t set them up to fail. If you set the bar too high for them, of course they’re not going to be able to jump over it. Be realistic in your expectations of others. Just because they sit at the top table doesn’t mean that they get any better food than those who sit further away. Allow them to enjoy their meal in the same way as they should let you enjoy yours. If you cannot do what they do, then you shouldn’t criticise them for daring to try. Do what you can and let them do what they can and together that shared vision of a better world has far more chance of coming into being. Respect your leaders. Pray for them. Don’t let your expectations be too heavy a burden for them to have to carry. What expectations do others have of you that you find difficult to live up to?

What expectations do you unfairly impose on others? How do you think that makes them feel?

What expectations are you putting on God at this time? Are they realistic? Are they reasonable?

How do you see the leaders in your life? What are your expectations of them?

Take time to pray for your leaders, whenever you can. Maybe today?